Enlightened, and into a World of Darkness

You know, since my earliest memories, I've always had a keen sense of the world around me. And it might seem arrogant to describe myself this way. But, even as a child, I was able to recognize Social imbalance on a magnified scale. ---- At the early age of 4, I can still remember the few times when mom & dad sometimes argued. And, regardless of the situation, I would automatically take sides with Father...... all of the time! My mother couldn't understand why her son would do this. But I realized that social standards swayed toward the woman. And it was more typical for friends to give their support toward the lady. Whereas, the husband generally stood alone. There aren't too many Four year-old kids who think that way, Huh?

------ At the age of 10, I often spoke with my Grandmother. But, for no apparent reason whatsoever, I would just End the conversation and walk away. The reason was because: I sensed that I was becoming alot closer to her, than with Grandfather. And I wasn't gonna let that happen. It just wouldn't be fair. (Yes, I was 10 years old).

----------Then, at the age of 16, I got into a conversation with my sister-in-law. And, for no reason whatsoever, she began poking humor at the male genitalia. I should've just stayed quiet, but an arguement ensued. And things were never fully the same until a decade later. By that time, her daughter was now 16. And, during a conversation with her during the holidays, you'll never guess what she began doing. Yup, she started making fun of the Male Sex-organs. But don't worry, I had already learned my lesson, not to get mad anymore.

---------- Now, to slip backward in time, I can tell you about the T.V. programs I used to watch, as a kid. The atmosphere resembled a religious cult, where the audience would chant in synchronized unison. It was the worst nightmare that could ever face a young child's life. And each distinct moment was an assault against humanity. Without exaggeration, it was Pure Emotional Rape. And yet, no one else seemed to notice. I found this to be particularly disturbing.

----------So, as the years went on, my teachers always taught me that 'boys are immature'. That's rather odd, considering the difficult life which had forced me to grow quickly. And besides, this message is unfair, and typically redundant. Plus, these teachings also violate scholastic ethics.

--------------- back to my home-life at age 12: I can remember how my mom & her friends would sometimes go out to dinner. And they wouldn't invite any of the husbands along. Finally, I gave 'every one of them' a 'Piece of my Mind'. HEY, "It's terrible how you ladies go to these fancy restaraunts, but you don't even share the evening with your partners."---- Apparently, the ladies didn't listen. Because, that summer, they all went to Florida together, while their husbands remained home, or, on the Jobsite.

-------------------- Now, to turn back the clock again, I can vividly remember 'plowing through' the most abusive magazines since the moment I could read. In fact, I began consuming miles upon miles of their psychologically-abusive artwork, long BEFORE I was able to read. Those memories are still quite vivid. Over time, I looked at thousands upon thousands of them, while sitting alone in my grandmothers attic. The atmosphere was comparable to a Horror Flick.

-------------------- Now, I don't wanna get into my personal affairs: but when I was coming of age, there were a few girls who flaunted themselves to me. I'm certainly not gonna claim that I was victimized. Actually, I enjoyed watching (or whatever) very very much. BUT, a decade later, I had vaguely remembered some of these ladies from my past. .....And some had married, while others visited family for a while. Anyway, I sometimes evesdropped when these young ladies chatted for hours. During their typical discussions, they would constantly talk about 'dull-sex'. They would all sit around the table, and Laugh over the whole idea. And they insisted that it "doesn't mean a damn thing" to them. And they don't want it. ( In fact, they rarely spoke about ANYTHING ELSE, during their phony discussions).
But I remembered most of these ladies from a decade earlier. And they CERTAINLY enjoyed every aspect of "you-know-what". So, I can't figure out why they seem determined to prove otherwise. ....Or, better yet, why they should even talk about it, at all. (Even worse, they were having these conversations while adolesent boys sat nearby. These ladies shouldn't be talking this way, especially around impressionable kids.) So, what's the whole Game?-
----- By now, I was old enough to understand their motive. I looked up to the clouds to answer this riddle, and some letters appeared from the midst. And raindrops spelled the word H-U-M-I-L-I-A-T-I-O-N. That's the anwer to the whole puzzle. She wants him to lack self-confidence, and to look like a goddamn fool. And, as Every Woman knows, this subject can very well accomplish that task.

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Anyway, I could spend the rest of my life, giving detailed examples similar to everything described in this essay. But, I won't go any further. -
---------There's one more sad twist to the story. During my younger days, I was a devout Catholic. But, over the course of time, I slowly drifted away. And, last year, I suffered an injury which almost destroyed my being. Dear old Mom hoped that my recovery would be seen as a devine message. But, I haven't seen it yet. However, I sincerely hope that, one day, I will meet Jesus. Hopefully, in a realm far far different.
---THE END

-----The purpose of this Blog is to establish myself primarily as an Activist promoting Social Accuracy. I choose to spend less time with 'hyped up' political issues. Rather instead, I've always been more interested in those aspects surrounding our daily lives. NOT the version created by the media. Anyway, I don't have enough Space to say everything, so, I chose a few things at random, which could easily apply to every boys life.----------------------------------
(Version 0.1. I've decided not to re-write any portion of this material. Although, it's a standard practice to improve my blogs, this particular one will remain untarnished, in it's original context.)